Wow i am really sorry things are going so bad for you. i had alot of problems with my situation...
I found out in oct i was preg. i was 6 weeks.. in november my fiance got arrested for aggravated battery on a preg person(me) but he never laid a hand on me sumone saw us arguing outside n called the cops. so for a while we were back in forth with court,public defenders, district attorneys-well in the end past all the added stress n stuff put on my body we got it droped(like i said it wasnt even true) so then also in november we got evicted from our apartment bc of that night n my HORRIBLE roommate at the time. so we lived at his grandmas for a little bit. but in devember one night after work i went out to dinner with my fiance, brother, n sis n law n i just felt so horrible. then we get home and i go to the bathroom n a big clot came out and then i just started bleeding. i was scared so i told my fiance me n my sis n law were going to the hosp. (he didnt have to go b/c ive gone to the hosp like 4/5 times since i found out i was preg b/c i randomly started bleeding n the baby was always fine so i told him ill just keep him posted he already knew the phone number to the hosp-like i said ive gone there a few times b4.) So thery did their ultrasounds n told me my baby had a strong heartbeat and that it was fine. Well my bleeding got WORSE and my cramps wow i thought i was gonna die. they tried to give me tylenol but i just got nausous and ending up sitting on the toliet bleeding like crazy with my head in a trash can throwing up and the nurse comes in with my release papers saying i have to go home. So i left. I went home n spent about 6 hours laying on the bathroom floor crying. i was in SO much pain! it was unbelievable i SWEAR it felt like i was getting stabbed over and over again in the stomach n lower back. plus i couldnt stop throwing up. I couldnt get comfortable those 6 hours felt like a week. My fiance tried to help but everytime he touched me it hurt. So i told him to just go hang out with my brother and ill let him kno if i needed anything so he kissed my forhead n left me alone. Well i FINALLY was able to fall asleep even tho i woke up every 30 min to rush to the bathroom at least i was sleeping. So the next day was a sunday n all i did was reast n sleep. I kept waking up crying or feeling really sad and couldnt figure out why. Then i went to work the next day.. left early to go to my dr app to check if the baby has down syndrom. My fiance didnt go to this one either b/c i didnt see the point he goes to every app.. so my sis n law came with me bc she hasnt seen him/her yet. Well the tech comes in n starts doin whatever she does n me n my sis n law are sayin how big its gotten n how he/she isnt bouncing all over today well thats when the tech said she was dun n had to get the dr to take his measurements. When the dr comes in he looks moves the ultrasound thingy and takes a deep breath n tells me that unfortunatly my baby no longer has a heart beat. I was DEVASTATED. he told me he was gonna go call my dr for me. n that i should go over there for another ultrasound..(it was in the next building over) then the tech came back in crying and hugged me n said she had to go b4 she gets in trouble. I couldnt even move i was so shocked and upset. i got myself together and to the car and broke down crying. I called my fiance n told him n he told me to hurry home n that hes sorry. I went to my dr she did an ultrasound and she told me it was true. my baby died within 24-48hrs ago. Which prob is what i was going thru on the bathroom floor. UGH! i couldnt belive the next thing that came out of her mouth. She told me its no big deal since your baby was 12 weeks old its too big to come out on its own and to just in time to not have to deliver it. Just do the d&C and it will be over. She said i figure you dont want to do it today i was like wow it hasnt even fully hit me yet that my baby is gone n u already wanna take it away. So she said ok how about friday or monday unless u dont want to go a week with the dead baby in u. I was like WTF IS WRONG WITH U LADY?! I told her no how about thursday im off that day this way i can rest. n then she goes into detail about what they do in the D&C n dont worry ill spare u the crazy hurtful things this women said to me. Then i asked her do you know what caused it. Granted i was WAYYYYY more stressed out then normal considering my recent train of events. But i am a smoker(cigg) and i was down to if i smoked at all it would be a hit or 2 n then put it out n only if i was stressed. MY dr turned around n told me well just so u know smoking while preg you prob killed your baby. I was like ya ok im out! n i left n unfortunatly the same dr was the one who preformed my d&c. Which might explain why a month later in january i ended up back in the hosp for 2 days with bad cramps and bleeding(felt like it was happening all over again.) Turned out she missed some stuff when she did my d&c. n now it was infected. So while i was in the hosp they asked me if i wanted to call my dr n i said NO WAY GIVE ME A NEW ONE! and they did and she was SO sweet and understanding and She did a few ultrasounds and EXPLAINED everything going on with me and what my choices are. Do ANOTHER d&c or give it some time and see if my body gets rid of it on its own. i picked get rid on its own b/c she told me with every d&c you lower your chances of having a successful pregnancy. So i made an app with her for a week later, and YAY my body got rid of 1/2 of it. So i went back 2 weeks later and everything was gone. I still get a little sad every once and a while. i was due june 12. So now its only like a month away and it sucks SO BAD! But dont let it run you. Dont let the fact that you miss them you wanted to hold them, play with them, teach them keep you down. I let it for a while and i couldnt let it go. I was always crying. and taking it out on my fiance ALOT. well I really wish my fiance was a little more supportive of the fact that i was sooo depressed and him saying you gotta get over it or let it go or you gotta move on just didnt help. But at least i wasnt the only one feeling it sometimes he understood its a little dif b/c my body had to experience it not his so our feelings about the subject are very different to him everything happens for a reason and we were not meant to have that baby right now. n as crazy as it is, i think he was right. Last month he got arrested again(no it doesnt happen all the time lol) but for a violation of probation he didnt even know he was on. He didnt pay a fine..well now he has to do min 30 days max 60days n he goes on may 21st. my due date was june 12. hed be in jail while id be giving birth. So i am happy that at least if we get preg again any time soon at least there will be no more courts, no more drama, less stress, we have a 1 bedroom apt just us in a quiet area n things are good. So after he gets out we'll see what happens. Keep your head up. Dont get stressed out b/c the pain isnt going away soon enough.. It never does. Trust me and 99% of the females who have gone thru this already. Every time you see a preg person see a baby anything it will come back jsut as time goes on it get less painful but its still there.
If you ever need anything like sum1 to talk to or something just email me nvme_420@yahoo.com.